My identity lies solely within Christ.

I grew up Christian. My entire immediate family and extended family are Christian. I am so blessed to be able to make a statement like that. As a family, we went to church every Sunday morning together. My grandparents and/or my dad would pray and bless our meals before we ate dinner. My dad would recite Psalm 23 (one of my favorite bible verses to this day)  to my siblings and me before bed every night. I went to bible camps with my cousin and attended VBS (Vacation Bible School for those who may not know). I had the most amazing childhood growing up. 

I started to play soccer in third grade and played every year through my freshman year of high school. Once I tried out for the competitive team in my city and made the team, it was my goal to play in college. This hadn’t waivered ever. I’m an extremely competitive and driven person and can thank soccer for a lot of this. My parents still didn’t want me missing church on Sundays for games, although this happened sometimes due to tournaments, haha. 

Fast forward to my high school years, still going to church, but at this point, I was going because my parents enforced it. I kind of “adopted” my parent’s faith during this time period. Then comes the week before our fall season started my senior year. We always attended this “tournament”, which consisted of a bunch of teams from the surrounding area to come and scrimmage other teams to get a gauge of where your team was at, skill level, and performance-wise. I get slide tackled from the side, and my ACL was torn, with some meniscus damage. My season was over before it even started. I was completely devastated and crushed. I had such high goals for myself and was geared up to break a school record for goals scored in one season. I truly thought the wind got knocked out of me and maybe tweaked my knee a bit. I get in to see a knee surgeon referred to by another teammate, and he knew right away by just performing one test on my knee. It didn’t hit me until then. I broke down in the car with my mom. 

Soccer was my entire adolescent life. Every team I tried out for, I made it, and started, and was a team captain. I loved leading by example, verbally, and having girls look to me to lead. I loved the pressure that came with this, and when it came down to needing a game-winning goal. 

I didn’t realize that I was so consumed with soccer, that it became my first love and identity. It consumed much of my time with practices, surgery, rehab to come back and play for my freshman year in college, games, watching film, etc. I wasn’t spending time in the Word, and praying to God as needed to sustain life and all it brings, the good and bad. 

Flash forward again to my freshman year of college. This was a season of heavy heavy travel with away games. We went to Upper Michigan two times. One way there is about a 15ish hour bus ride. Yikes! As a team we spent an average of 26 hours per week watching film, practicing, icing, rehabbing and playing games. On top of being a full-time student. I didn’t go to church once during the first half of the season. 

I remember driving past a big red flag stating “Rock City Church” with some type of arrow pointing towards the church. So, that next Sunday I made my way to it but got lost along the way. I put in the address and it took me to a vacant movie theatre, lol. I called my mom saying how confused I was and made my way home. On the way home I drove past that very red flag I did the weekend prior. I made it to a different branch of the church. I was a bit late, but only by a worship song or so. I immediately felt like I found my home church. This branch was on Ohio State’s campus, so it had a vibrant young adult community, which was an answered prayer I didn’t know I needed. I knew I needed to get plugged in right away. I was going to church every Sunday. That next weekend I was greeting people at the next service. I then got plugged into a life group of college students, and a couple of months later, I and three other students end up leading this bible study. That puts me to the end of our season, and I felt God nudging me to get baptized. So, on December 3rd of 2017, I got baptized by our old life group leader (a married couple). My whole family was there to watch, and I’m so grateful for that. I finally took the step of making my faith public to other brothers and sisters in Christ. Truly, it felt like a weight lifted off of my shoulders.

I knew once I started going to church, and met such incredible friends there, that my identity was no longer a soccer player, but a daughter of Christ. I served Him, and Him alone. I was consumed by God’s unfailing love, trust, mercy, and wrapped up in His holy grace. That feeling of something missing met in His embrace of me. I looked forward to our bible study every Wednesday night. I loved helping lead others to Christ through His Spirit in me. Going to church every Sunday was not something I just had to do or check off the to-do list, but something I loved and look forward to every week (and still do). 

God had radically changed my life ever since then. I transferred to Ohio State to finish out my undergrad and joined Kappa Kappa Gamma (my grandma was a KKG alum too, and even living in that very same house I did too). I continued to serve at Rock City and continued to lead our bible study. Once the Holy Spirit dwelled within me, I no longer had the same perspective on life. He changed the way I speak, listen, walk out my faith, and how I perceive the world. I am renewed and a born-again Christian. My old self died on the Cross with Jesus. He opened my eyes and gave me a new life. He alone is to thank. He alone breathes life into me with every breath I take, every heartbeat, and every morning He blesses me to wake up with. 

I love to get in His Word. I love to journal and study His Word. I love to listen to worship music. The desire to listen to secular music, movies, and entertainment is no longer so apparent. The closer I get to Him, the less and less I feel a part of this world. I am in this world, but not of it. Every day I grow older, the more my pure bliss, joy, peace, and happiness grow within knowing Christ. How could it not? The Hollywood movies have it all wrong. Love is knowing God. God is love. His whole being is love. Dying a selfless and excruciating death is love. The Bible is His love letter to His sons and daughters. My better half is actually my whole being, Christ within me and with me. No amount of money, fame, status, or relationship can satisfy my eternal desire for something more. This longing can only be met with Christ.  

My identity lies within Jesus Christ.